Comments for zero-chance.com

Comment on A (true) story and two haiku by Josh/hw

Josh/hw — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 12:08:32 +0000

I like this post

Comment on To Clarify: by Anonymous

Anonymous — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 00:07:56 +0000

Good writing! Although I (being 54) would love to see someone tell a story without gutter language and using the Lord's name (in vain). I just had a wisdom tooth pulled and it is not causing me any trouble: it's the extraction of a remnant of a tooth that was left over from an unnecessary root canal done 10 years ago (didn't even have a cavity!). That little bugger was harder to get out than my wisdom tooth. and two days later: dry socket. i waited a whole 6 hours before i smoked very very very gently, hardly sucking at all! i think certain instructions were omitted, e.g.: don't brush your teeth, certainly don't spit; well i did both, again, very very very gently. and today was told, You smoked! You Have Dry Socket! I said: What's That? Well, dammit, they should have explained all of this stuff BEFORE the gas, the shots, the 3 hours in the chair! (had some cavities in there too: PEOPLE: GO TO THE DENTIST EVERY YEAR!!!). I couldn't wait to get out of there and between the fuzzy head and having to pee, maybe a few of their instructions slipped in.

Ah, well. I have my two upper wisdom teeth (not impacted by the way) extracted at least 15 years ago and it was a breeze. I certainly didn't get dry socket, and i don't think i had any symptoms after a week.

Considering the pain and smell - it may be wise to get a very good referral to a dentist - don't go to just anyone. Hope you're feeling better zero-chance, ad

Comment on by Emily

Emily — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 17:07:00 +0000

I totally love your soundtrack choices! I’ve never heard Stars before, but I really, really like that song.

Comment on Thar be stressful. by Mom

Mom — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 23:14:00 +0000

Gerbera daisies–5 daisies at $2.67 per stem plus the cost of a vase (estimate at $20) clearly equals $60. We can buy the vases and the daisies and set them up. Who needs a florist?

Comment on The cave does not have Internet access. by Mom2

Mom2 — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 23:44:00 +0000

What you need is an ultra-gay flaming male wedding planner! He will serve two purposes. He will plan the ultimate wedding and make you more gorgeous than you already are AND he will make your father flip out.

Rules are made to be broken. Many couples end up putting their weddings together in a very short period of time. Hey, I started seeing Mr. Guillerm in June, became engaged in July???, and the wedding was March 5. We didn't even look at places until the fall or winter. I never tried on any gowns--we made mine.

In case Steve forgot to tell you, you kids never have to worry about anything because I will take care of all family worrying.

As for depressed mothers having stillborn or deformed babies, I guess that explains my two.

xoxoMom

Comment on I hate my life. by Leopold Stotch

Leopold Stotch — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 16:18:00 +0000

That blows. If it’s any consolation, I have the Cadillac of insurance and the amount of things they don’t cover (or barely cover) I could fit into Dodger stadium.

Comment on I hate my life. by Phoebe

Phoebe — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 15:11:00 +0000

Have you called the insurance company? I’ve had the same thing happen, and it’s always been a billing mistake. Usually a call to insurance, and then a call to the doctor’s office, has straightened it out.

Comment on A simple "wrong" would not have done it. by Mom2

Mom2 — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 23:07:00 +0000

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75-year-old Texas rancher whose hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Sarah Palin and her bid to be a heartbeat away from being President.

The old rancher said, "Well, ya know, Sarah Palin is a post turtle."

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was.

The old rancher said, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle."

The old rancher saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain.

"You know she didn't get up there by herself, she doesn't belong up there, she doesn't know what to do while she is up there, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put her up there to begin with."

Comment on No more wisdom teeth! by Nicole

Nicole — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 17:27:00 +0000

*delayed reaction* Jesus, what the hell happened to your face?

Comment on To Clarify: by Mom2

Mom2 — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 20:36:00 +0000

Maybe if you didn’t run around helping your Mom move…Hey, I didn’t want to scare you and tell you it sucks. I had to have mine out as soon as they showed on x-rays, so they were extracted one at a time over the course of two or three years. I can tell you, I did not want to go back after the first one.

Try to sleep with you head a bit elevated. If you still have pain, call the doc and tell him you need Percocet, at least at night so you can sleep. Do not use a straw. Rinse with salt water often (it might help the stitches dissolve faster). And make your boy wait on you hand and foot like I did for him. Milk it, baby!

Oh, yeah. Have Yermo write on you with a Sharpie–”I did this to the bitch because she looked at another man.”